8 days MC. song boh?! but it doesn't matter cos i'll still be back in school on monday. living on banana milkshake for today, maybe tmr as well. i'm refusing to talk cos moving my mouth will cause additional pain. so far the pain has been bearable with the help of painkillers. w/o the painkillers, it's like living hell! makes me wanna rip my mouth apart.

time:0800. stepped into the cold op theatre with a thin piece of cloth. BRrrrrz.. laid down on a bed where they covered me with a blanket(helped onli a lil' cos my hands were still exposed). the worse thing happened when the nurse took my left hand and asked me to start exercising(clenching & relaxing my fist) cos she was gonna give me an injection. initially i tot that was the anasthesia but it turned out to be a plug for drip! ahhh.. hate all tis, felt so helpless. thank gdness tis one dint hurt as much as laz yr. my right arm was wrapped in tt blood pressure "machine". was on ECG(to monitor the heart) too. they pasted the "signallers"(round white pieces of tape), on my left thigh, on each shoulder and another on the right side of the waist. finally time for breathing "oxygen". after a few minutes, my vision blurred and the next thing i knew, i was back in the ward. time:1000.

bascially aft so much, i survived! haha reali grateful to my mum for taking leave to be with me, and preparing my lunch, taking the trouble to blend the banana & milk. although we took a bus back(she sent her car for servicing), she actually suggested taking a cab back(rare opportunity)but i rather save the money since i was not in a bad state. was fully awake by the time i was discharged. yes.. so.. thanks mummy! i love u..! awww so sweet rite?! hahaz.

although thanks to my clazmates who cared. i'm fine! cya all on mon ya? i'm quite sure my absence is felt during lessons rite? esp during GP. poor von-von, no buddy. oh nO! juz realised sth, she'll be stuck with yuming. alamak! sorry von dear! i'll be back next week to the rescue. hehe. bear with it for tmr as well. skali yuming pon sch again. haha.

these 2 days my blog would be updated very regularly. so many things to say yet onli able to type it all out. thank gdness i started a blog if not.. i'll be quite miserable.

tmr going for op. no intense feelings now. juz "disappointed" at the fact tt i cannot eat at the newly renovated makan parade. such a pity! today went there with wing hang to "cheong" again. eat alot sia, as usual. pon the talk tis afternoon, best part was yvonne told me lee dint noe, he onli knew yuming was missing. who noes? maybe in the end he realised i was not there too. its okay! i hv "valid" excuse! rite. onli i will believe myself.

met kaibei, shawn & iaN for dinner. supposed to catch tomb raider but no gd seats left. i reali tink ian & me juz hv no fate to watch movie together, tWinS efFeCt would most probably be the first and last movie we watch together, not alone mind u, with shawn & ivan too. oh no! i tink he's my new crush! haha. wat's new rite? i hv too many crushes. life is more interesting tis way, won't u agree? anyway, i was juz observing him. dunno how to put in words, but ya.. i was juz looking. then at nydc, he caught me looking twice and said, "why u looking at me liddat?" quite paiseh but juz act normal. haha. jialat liaoz. nvm we can onli be frenz, dun wan hv any hopes. it's juz gonna be a passing thing. juz wondering, wat will happen if i tell him i like him? tink there'll be dire consequences. haha shall not tink abt it anymore.

my STAND: Being SiNgLe is still the BesT! (at least it's for now, who noes, maybe i'll change my mind in time to come.) u're free to do anything u wan, be it liking ppl or flirting! life is so carefree. live life the way u want!

A Friend's love says: " If you ever need anything, I'll be there."
True Love says: " You'll never need anything; I'll be there."

"Love isn't blind, it just only sees what matters."

heyz. gonna be a short entry today. d/l a few good songs. at least they're gd to me. hehe. too bad if u dun tink the same way. played pool aft pw discussion. still not too bad. surprisingly. quite long since i last played. ate crepes, onli $2. *yumzyumz* parkway's newly renovated food court is nice. the atmosphere is "friendly". no movie again today! sadz. hopefully i get to watch tmr, if not, i dunno when i can catch it. thurs is my op. praying for a 2-day recovery. more than speedy rite? cos i hv flag day on sat. followed by claz bbq although i can onli show face. surely cant eat. its ok. shed the fats! haha. ponning tmr's CT assembly, a tok by some HDB personnel. boring. *yawnz* mavis came over for dinner today cos she wanted to collect khadi's shoes to use. went PP, she bot a very sweet card for her bf for one mth anniversary. it read sth lyk, "i'm head over heels in like with u!" so sweet rite? if onli i could give sth similar to someone too. then again, being single is cool! played the ranking game today aft months. guess the choices always circle ard the same 5 guys: rL, pH, panda, luBin & keith aka (act) seh kia. yay! tmr there's badminton for pe. i'm so looking forward to it. better go prepare my bathing stuff. i'll be back..

i'm back! not that i'm feeling very energetic but at least in a better state than yest. haha. was supposed to go for a movie tis evening but cancelled due to circumstances. actualli cos it's my tenant's bdae, so my mum asked me to stay for dinner. could hv gone to see the later show at 9+ but.. dint. *sobz* haha i hv no fate to watch movie with ian siaz. sad case. i'm jOkinG! hopefully tmr or wed i get to watch. juz the tot of it excites me. he's quite nice la. took cab and sent me home from yishun. i still tink he's cute although not the extreme cute kind like andy ng(star soccer player) from 03s42. why dint i go s4?! haha tt is a dream. cos if not for f. math i'll be taking bio-chem.

today yvonne confessed that she tot khoon wee was the cutest guy in claz on our first CT session. gosH! he onli looks gd if he doesn't smile. was i being mean again?! haha well, for me, i tot and still tink pang hao is the best looking liaoz. quite sad la but ya. wat to do? it's s3! wad do ya expect rite? alphis & bing liang considered not bad liaoz. it's reali pathetic! cheng xun is ok too. why izzit all RI guys?! dam. hate their ego. esp marcus aw's. haha oopz he's not in vj, in rj.

been a long day sia. listening to rL crap the whole day. from lesson time till he finished his katong laksa. nv seen anyone as enthu as him abt laksa siaz. i feel so crappy today. muz be due to the guys' influence. quite irritated with myself. was screaming into shawn's ear over the phone, actuali was screeching! tink he nearly went deaf. sorry! i wanna go swimming. maybe i will, either tmr or wed, depending when my movie is. muz do soo many things within these 3 days b4 my op. juz hope the pain is bearable. then i'll be still be able to do many other things. pray hard!

ok i tink i better go complete some tutorials now. trailing by alot. the whole of oscillations was copied, as in took down all the ans lee gave. dam cham. dunno how to do so no choice. then organic chem tutorial i totally nv touch! jialat liaoz. haven even read the notes! i'm lagging big time siaz. muz buck up!

hi guyz. whole body aching now. feeling dam tired. lost mahjong $30. nvm la. cannot win all the time. ok tink i reali in no mood to write anything. so i'll cya & take carez! nite..

viCtorY! 3 cheers~hiphiphurray~! s2/3 girls won floorball & netball! i played 7 out of the 8 matches for floorball, mainly defense. soo hapie! how ironic of the fac with the least girls to win 2 titles. surprising how all of us managed to hv the chemistry to work together, not forgetting tt we knew each other onli b4 the match started. anyway, WeLL dOnE! *pat on the back*

basically i played from 9am to 3.30pm, including puSHbaLL which was utter nonsense. tried the fLyiNg FoX too! nutin great actuali. next muz go for abseiling. ok, i'm super shagged! legs aching. tmr still gonna play badminton in the morning. hope i survive siaz.

sth interesting today happened, sherlyn was hesitating to ask me abt my father cos she dint noe how to phrase the question. finally, she said, "ur father.." told her abt my parents' separation & tt i haven seen my dad since june 98'. yupz more or less tts abt it. i'm sure u won't want the details. haha. i dint wanna make tis known in secondary sch cos i was afraid of being ostracized. u noe how childish some are at tt age, might go round spreading, insensitive to others' feelings. anyway i'm glad sherlyn asked, slowly helping me to overcome tis embedded fear. thanx dear!

today's entry is rather short as compared to previous entries. very very very tired. nitex.. sleep well ya?

paNg seH-ing day! kena during chem lab, sat next to adrin(gross!) right in front under chanks nose, dam. and for phy lec, sat alone, one seat away from cx. nvm i survived! ended up turning ard and toking to the guys. surprisingly lab periods today were not as bad as expected. first time i actuali tried a chem prac on my own. achievement! ppl change dunch they? my buddies for GP: yvonne & jiemin. cooL! i'm sure we'll be able to help each other. i guess my language is one of the best in claz juz tt i hv no content, so not scoring for GP. gotta buck up girl! pull ur socks way higher! im sure u can do beta than tis..

hmmz tmr i hv a tight schedule. not going to do CIP liaoz. playing floor ball & push ball. its like from morning till afternoon. need the workout badly manz! haha if not i tink i'll turn to 'wanwan' in ch8 7pm serial Holland Village. wahaha so exaggerating la but.. met jeremy nonis in the bus tis morning. funny how onli in vJ we actuali reali tok to each other. all tis while we had nutin to say. good, at least one more frenship secured. btw, if u're wondering who he is, church fren, known him since primary sch, currently in 03s17. wan noe more? was from ngee ann pri then to SJI. staying ard the vicinity of vJ. tts for me to noe, for u to find out! *bleahz* =p

oh, moo-moo called today. was surprised though. but it was all abt "making use" of me la. wat's new? he's a jerk. wanted to noe if there're any cheap bowling rates in town. looking back, i realized i was so blind & stupid to get so close. he's not tt gd a guy after all. why give up the ocean for a rotten fish?! haha. oopz! was i being mean again?! can't help it. it's innate.

ooh had a fantastic lunch today! although it was onli sch's mee pok but i had the company of lynette wee! been reali long since i laz had a gd tok with her. moreover, i had the best scenery! haha guess who? actuali i tink u all noe who by now..JaroN~! i was facing him while eating. guess the noodles nv tasted nicer! haha joking. reali been seeing him ard alot tis week. izzit fate? haha oh no! im obsessed with him. tis is not going anywhere. beta stop!

arghh. cant stand my claz, other than the clique, which leaves abt 12 of them. they are so dead! take today for example, i tried to ask who was interested in trying out the new rock wall/abseil/zipline. no response! they give u the "i can't be bothered" attitude. frustrating reali. without saying much, all guys of cos. the girls are 4eva so ONz! i surrender! shall hang out with the norm ppl. care not abt the rest since they care not abt u.

tis wat happens when u are from a double maths claz:
"Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important."

wazzup babe?! ok so now i noe i hv BAD taste, jon ong is uGLy la. U-G-L-Y u ain't got no alibi, u're ugly, hey hey, u're ugly. oopz! no cruel intentions juz tt tis song was played in the morning when the SCs did a live ad for openhse03'. it's been a long & tiring day. onli gd thing was chanks did not turn up for chem tutorial. PraiSe the LoRd! went macs aft sch with keith, panda & rL. we were badmouthing ppl sia. ok maybe not too such an evil extent but we were critisizing others, or should i say analysing their behaviour. i seriously DO NOT like adrin. other than tt, the rest are frenz or acquaintances. i'm juz glad to noe nice guys lyk panda, rL, pH, lubin. as for the girls, all of them make the cut! wAy tO gO! dunno wat's all of their impressions of me? should be quite neutral, more to the positive side, hopefully. *hopes & prays* haha i'm sure i make a gd fren rite?! my view of myself: i'm a girl brimming with confidence, no one can reali get me down, onli my mum or mavis(my reali gd fren). at least i noe my social skills are one of a kind. tt wat's make me unique. quote from rL, "everyone is unique, that's why we're all common!" it makes gd sense doesn't it?

oh sent ken teo a gdnite msg laz nite, dint expect him to return one. switched on my phone onli at noon, read the msg. it went sth like tis: "er..i dunno if i should tell u or not..erm..erm..i juz found out i reali like u.. -blank screen- to sleep well and haf sweet dreamz.." my heart stopped beating for a second, my stomach fell to the ground as with the pull of gravity. u noe the chinese saying 'yi chang huan xi yi chang kong', my sentiments exactly. well, who asked me to take a fancy on him? he's the first and i hope onli younger guy i like. hopefully things develop. hehe. then again, come to tink of it, maybe going for younger guys is not tt bad an idea. *considering* MAYBE, one day he will say tt to me w/o the 'sleep well..' part. haha i'm dreaming again! *pinch* wake up girl! get back to reality. why am i so boy-crazee?! i was doing fine last yr, dint like anyone, maybe oso cos of O levels, had to focus. until tis yr when i got to noe the old ppl then the craze came back again. no good. i wanna get back my carefree life!

learnt a new term during GP today - glass ceiling. actuali first saw tis term in jan's blog aka writer's blog. it's reali unfair how women hv internalised inferiority imposed on them, by male, by society. tis is a controversy esp in today's society where female homo sapiens start to make a breakthru' and make themselves heard, loud & clear. they've made a statement, underlying tis is their fight for eQuaLity. *..food for thought..* guyz take some time to tink abt it. girlz let's juz wait and see.

hmmz tmr gotta go for blood test! scared. the tot of it will make me lose sleep tonite. plus the fact tt there are 2 practicals tmr. however slack is tmr, it sure is gonna bOriNg! *excited* yearning for games' day and it's happening tis saturday. actuali gonna be "doing" flag day simultaneously. how jian of me rite?! then again, who asked moe to introduce tis stupid pearls system. hv to accumulate 80hrs for 4(max) pts under service category. juz like sherlyn said,"in tis dog-eat-dog society, onli those who work smart not hard, reigns." give it careful tot, u'll realise its true.

boo! finally managed to get my icq back into working condition. was screwed up juz now cos of my bro. dunno wat he did tis afternoon while using the comp. shall not complain anymore since its functioning alrite for now. tired from scolding my bro too. tink his ears are permanently shut for the nite! haha. so exaggerating rite?

played badminton during pe. cool! had a one-on-one with lubin. made him fall and scrape his knee. feel quite bad but he's a guy so i'm sure he can take it in his stride. haha. wednesdays are slack days. yuming DINT come for pw again! arghh. he's an irritant! we're starting on our written report so i guess he cant contribute much since he doesn't noe wats been going on. seriously a superficial 5-member group, in reality, a 4-member team. wat can i do?! i'm a helpless grp leader. dam.

spoke to chengxun in the morning. he's in a dilemma. although he feels more for his ex. cant blame him. i mean, he hasnt made any commitments towards jm. gd thing is tt not all's over for jm, there's still hope, according to him. so, JM cheEr Up! okay im gonna make some confessions here and jm if u're reading tis, forgive me. initially, when jm joined our claz aft first 3 mths i dint reali hv a very gd impression. dint reali wanna get close. slowly, i saw the better side of her, realised maybe she was my type of fren too. got to know her alittle better and now, we're frenz! at least i wont say tt she's juz a clazmate. we tok abt stuff, so today could see there was sth troubling her, moz prob abt cx. i feel tt she had placed high hopes on tis whole "relationship" to work out ever since both of them expressed their feelings. now she's definitely disappointed. it's ok jm, tt's the way life is. u've juz gotta learn from it. understand perfectly how u feel. maybe it's time for u to be single again! enjoy the freedom u once owned. haha sound lyk some experienced person toking! i'm definitely NOT, don't worry!

oh well, ups & downs in life can nv be avoided. juz face it & live life! i tink i hv a fetish for writing. my entries are sooo long! haha but i'm enjoying it! been seeing ard jArOn lately. dam shiok! reali pleasure to the eyes. dunno why i'm so into him! he's got tis handsome yet ugly look. haha does tt define cute?! maybe he's the real meaning of cute, but juz tt the actual deviates so much. CUTE in today's context would be some reali boyish-looking male species. gosh! tis sounds like a GP lesson. haha it has tis socially conceived notion which is a fallacy. did tt make sense? nvm i'm not exactly sure wat im saying too.

okiez. tt's all for today folks! no inspiration to write anything more. advance nitenite.

its been a traumatising day for me.
firstly got back mine GP papers, 54.5 onli. very disappointed cos aft going thru the ans i realised tt the paper was quite easy, could hv scored much higher. i was happy i dint fail my compo though cos aft the exam i spoke to my GP tutor and she said i might hv written outta pt. had 27/50 for tt. the sad part was i onli scored 12/20 for language! i hv nv gotten so low. at least not for all my other essays. and wats contradicting is tt i scored 12/15 for paper 2. weird rite? i seriously tink it muz hv been a mistake on the the marker's part.
secondly, my mum felt it was better for me to hv both of my bottom wisdom teeth extracted so tt in future it will not cause any trouble. date for the surgery is already fixed. 31-08-03. pray for me! i'll be under general anesthesia, sight effects is a slight temporary memory loss. it freaked me out for awhile when my mum told me tt. tt's not all. i hv to go for a blood test before the surgery. and i simply HATE needles poking into my body. had enuff of them while i was admitted last yr on my BDAE! dam. tis sux! i had 9 holes then cos they somehow loved drawing my blood. reali brings back bad memories. now, everytime i noe my blood is to be drawn, i tremble, and i mean seriously shiver so badly tt i can turn pale. tis is how bad it is. tt's juz life for me..

at my mummy's office now, waiting for her to clear her paper work, accompanying her as well. haven taken dinner though but had some snacks juz now. one gd thing was tt i managed to finish some of my hmwk. however, there're limitations becos i dun hv my tys so i cant complete my complex nos. tutorial.

oh! yuming finally came for project work today. how amazing! but it reali made no diff whether he's present or not cos he juz doesn't give a dam and doesn't open his golden mouth. tis is so frustrating! we've been doing all the work, or rather kar seng & yong teck have been doing most of it. budden even slackers like keith & myself contribute. hai. project work juz sux! we had a short meeting today mainly cos there was foto taking at 2.35pm. so dumb! the 8 girls were made to sit with mr lee in front! arghh. aft tt we had informal shots, used jm's digi cam. me & yvonne were made to "kiss"! haha. looked quite sick but was funnie. my claz can be so fun and yet so unhappening at times. wat's going on?!

gonna go home soon. maybe i'll be back later. haf fun! take carez! love ya guyz!

wow! seems like a "blog fever" burning now. been reading so many blogs. some interesting, others so-so la. there's photo taking tmr, then i hv dental appt, dentist wans to see my mum regarding the extraction of my bottom left wisdom tooth which involves an operation cos its not even out yet! i dun wan to go for it but do i hv a choice? tis is bad. its gonna be another mth where i hv to live on porridge. sad case la. hate to be in such a pathetic state. (panghao if u're reading tis, dun laff cos tis is not meant to be funnie.) it's juz gonna hurt big time! and most prob gotta miz lotsa school which is not exactly gd news considering the fact tt promos is on its way. haiz juz gotta bear with it. torture sia.

haha juz saw a foto of the old ppl taken at marina sq in 2000 posted in e-grps. they look so toot! reali hard to imagine how they've changed so much. maybe army does change ppl. it reminds me how much ken c. has changed; he used to be tis sweet gentle guy who had no temper. now, he's like a prowling tiger waiting to pounce on any poor victim. its scary. even my couz tinks so.

was toking to my couz (he's a shawn too!) on icq juz now. he suddenly missed his gf so much. sounded so sad, felt sad for him too cos he's currently under attachment and denise is studying in TP. they dun get to meet during the week. well, they've been together for 4 yrs. how time reali flies! hopefully they can married. that'll be the perfect ending. it'll be like a dream come true, live happily ever after. do such things happen in reality? at least i noe it doesn't for me, as in my family. somehow seems nutin will hv a nice ending. sure some hiccups, be it minor or major. life is like a irreversible reaction which implies it can nv reach equilibrium. sad facts of life! let's be mature abt tis and face it.

today had to fill up some form regarding career talks. felt dam extra cos my first choice was psychology followed by law. no one else had the same combination. it's like i dun belong to my class in terms of ambition and outlook in life i guess. i'll still survive. there was tis section where u had to fill up ur parents'occupation. panda was beside me, he asked why my dad's colum was empty. and i couldn't give a direct ans?! i tink im still not over it no matter how i try. i cant bring myself to open up so much yet. guess it takes time rite? so whoever is reading tis, guess u all can guess by now wat's going on. need more details can ask me direct but i doubt anyone will do tt. im juz scared of insensitive ppl.

anyway gdnitex! shall go sleep now and be prepared for the GP shock tmr! wish me luckZ!

"when a gal ignores you after you've done something wrong, it's best to give her some time to cool down before touching her heart with an apology." <- absolutely true rite? took tis from my fren's blog. guyz, tink abt it ok?

hmmz i juz changed the title of my blog! cool huh. seriously, i tink im a comp idiot! was setting up a claz blog but as usual problems cropped up so.. ended up setting up 2 namely, 03s32 & vjc03s32. how dumb rite? haha well tts juz me and computers for u!

school was ok today although i was very sleepy and still am. the "spicy" part today was when everyone teased jiemin abt chengxun. so sad! haha. jiemin actually sat behind him during chem lec which gave us even more reason to suan her. to make things worse, cx had to pass her a "love letter". awww so sweet. hapie she's found the guy she wans to be with although u can say tt maybe their relationship would be too close for comfort - same faculty=same lectures.

its reali funnie how many couples form at vjC. i've seen quite a handful of married couples who were both previously from vj, not necessarily same batch. oopz! ian's from vj too rite? am i trying to say sth? haha. sat beside winghang for chem lec juz now. we're toking abt the old ppl. hehe. she ranked them as follows: ian, ivan, kaibei, shawn, yx. asked her to watch tomb raider with us too! yay!

oh juz remembered, haPie BirtHday KhooNwEe! had a nice prima deli cake. was quite big though. kw is such a spoilsport. he's the first CLEAN bdae guy i've seen in my claz so far. usually none can escape "scot-free". he could onli becos he threatened to scream. wat a wet blanket! *sigh*

someone stole $12 from my wallet. *sadz* wat a nice no. but still its not reali tt small an amount. tmr gonna get back GP papers, i'm quite scared reali becos my compo died! wrote out of pt i tink. nvm. learnt nv to commit such a mistake the hard way i guess. juz gotta wait and see how well i've fared.

shall go now. maybe be back later if i suddenly hv the urge to write again. hehe sounds gross rite?! to whoever who is reading tis, cherish the times u spend with ur frens or loved ones, cos u nv noe wat tmr will bring. why am i even saying tis? haha i noe why! its the urge u see! =p

slept at 2plus last nite, woke at 0840 tis morn. was planning to go church when shawn sms-ed to say badminton courts were onli available from 11 to 12. hitched a ride from my mummy who was sending my siblings for their martial arts(aikido) lesson which i can proudly say,"i QUIT liaoz." *evil grinz* took 190 to orchard and a train to khatib. had a very "xiong" round of badminton with an ex-school team SinGles player, honestly, i was terrorised initially. we played like onli half court and i was "dancing" all over the place liaoz. he was juz there relaxing and laughing at me. i felt so helpless! arghh. haha. he did some "qie-ing"(slicing) and i went,"woah, now wat was tt?" really impressive i muz say. or maybe, i've nv seen any real match before. hehe. we played doubles with 2 middle-aged indian guys. hmmmz i tink i dragged him down rather than help him. he could hv faired better if he played one against both of them. shawn, if u're reading tis, tis is how highly i tink of ur badminton although those two guys not very gd la. hahahz. im happie i spent my sunday morning burning calories! i reali need to exercise sia. so fat liaoz. *sobz*
had a nice lunch, char siew & roast duck noodles. i tink it was meant for either shawn or sam. haha but i finished it! oopz! however, the best part of it all, was the appearance of ian! uh oh! do i sound excited? haha nah. actuali nutin much la. impression of him getting better by day. dunno why oso. weird rite? looking forward to watching Tomb Raider next week. hehe.

went for chinese tuition. spent half the time talking to my teacher abt homosexuality & sex education. can u imagine it being conversed in chinese?! haha oh well, i did it! unbelievable rite? tis reminds me:GP lessons are getting so interesting becos the topic we're discussing is on GenDer! feminism, blah blah blah. ask ms celena oon(my ex GP tutor) abt all my essays. haha they're always on tis topic cos it is my interest and wat i'm best at. speaking of GP, i saw ms cindy low(my new GP tutor) aft church. not surprising to find out she's a catholic and attends the same church cos she was formally a kc girl. in other words, a BitCh! its true. i was from kc primary, and im proud to say im a BticH too! anyone who noes me well should noe tt. at least tts wat my couz calls me. u noe sth? i seem to hv an affinity with GP tutors. noe them better than any of my clazmates. last time, i saw ms oon on the bus aft i caught the MatriX with ri-liang & lubin. somehow, we hv lotsa things to tok abt, be it personal or sch. and both stay near me. haha oon-near parkway, low-old airport. i'm caught in the middle! oopz tts soo lame!

yay! tmr got cake to eat. sherlyn bot prima's cake to celebrate khoonwee's bdae. *yumz* juz the tot of it makes me salivate. see wat i mean? i'm a piG! gosh muz change my eating habits liaoz. healthy eating! oh. kenneth teo juz msged me. oohhh i can feel my heart beating! haha he's the onli younger i've liked. cant believe it either. oh no! im starting the guy thing again. tink its juz in me. budden life would be boring w/o guys rite? so.. get my pt?!

so i've come to the end of today's update. maybe sth interesting will happen later? who noes rite? yupz. juz wanna end off saying how happie im feeling now. woke up tis morning, finally got rid of the feeling of helplessness, can say i dun like him anymore. i shall not bother abt ppl who dun bother abt me, or rather dun care. also i finally found the song i want! stUcK by stacie orrico. its nice. meaningful rather.

juz came back not too long ago. i cant believe i actuali benefited from College day, managed to finish integration tutorial. glad i dint pon if not i'll most prob be wasting my time slacking again. had a nice dinner with shawn & ian after tt at PS pastamania. it was shawn's "drizzlecheque" becos i dint get to eat dinner one saturday nite. also the nite when i got to noe shawn's lil' bro, sam! he finished 2nd for C div Masters today, proud of him! way to go!

yupz. the two guys ordered 4 pastas and 1 pizza. i eat until cannot tok liaoz but they're still not FULL!! wat to do? guys' stomaches are like a bottomless pit. all shared a starbucks venti jelly caramel frapuccino, erm, like a coffee version of bubble tea. we then walked all the way to paragon. sth dam sick happened there. shawn sorta tripped over a platform which resulted in his knee going up a woman's ass! the best part was according to shawn, she said,"ooohh.." GROSS! hahaha. finally ended up at BK far east aft more walking. i ate strawberry swirl chessecake pie! *yumz yumz* its been awhile since i last had it. time passed so fast. before i knew it time had it to return home. ian suggested taking 14 together. cool! haha. cos i tink he's quite cute! as usual, i'm starting my boy-crazee crap. but.. tis one no longer boy liaoz. haha 3 yrs older. well, it was a nice ride home. its always nice going out with guys. haha at least tts my opinion. to each his own rite?!

suddenly tot of wat ri-liang said to me in claz juz now while waiting to be seated in the LT. oopz i make it sound as if its some big ocassion for us. haha. yes as i was saying, he was doing up the exco 2003 for sailing list. i was surprised michelle ong was not asst. captain so i asked why. his answer was REALLY hurting. "u tink everyone so power-hungry like u?" juz cos he noes i wanted to be the capt doesnt mean he can pass such remarks. *sigh* it juz hurts to hear a fren say tt to u.. guess u all cant understand rite? its okay. i'll live.

heard kaibei leaving for indonesia tmr to pay his grandparents a visit before he starts his uni education in the states. here's to wishing him a safe trip!
wonder how the moo-moo's doing. still stuck at home? rotting in bed. haha. major illness sia. haven heard from him. realised life can be as fun and interesting with or w/o him. he sux! sometimes i wonder why do i even bother? liking a person is hard. why did i even start? now i dun even noe where it ends or how it ended. so many things left unsaid. so many questions where the answers i can onli guess. will i ever brace my courage to ask? nvm i'm surviving fine.

its so much more entertaining bio-ing guys, esp JARON! hmmz john ong not bad too. hehe. but all tis are the kinds for looking ONLY, nutin more. can tell they are not my type, all hv terrible AP! but then again, guys like them to me, are the most attractive. maybe i juz hv tis thing for RI guys and their never-can-be-deflated ego.
can onli conclude:being single is juz soo fun! enjoy while u can. nv rush things. they will onli turn out sour.

leave u with a line from a song of which the title i've been trying very hard to find.
"i love u, but i hate u, i'm stuck on u.."

hmmz tt was abt my classmates rite? now tok abt the OLD ppl (vj bowling seniors). ivan, kaibei & shawn turned up for the bbq. outnumbered the j2s sia. haiz there is uneasy tension between kaibei & myself. guess things cant go back to wat they were before. dunno if tts gd or bad? maybe getting to know these seniors was reali a terrible mistake. they hv created an impact on my life. then again, maybe its a blessing in disguise. who knows rite?

yx has been sick for a week. poor thing.. oopz do i even sound sympathetic? heard from him, initially suspected dengue fever, then viral fever. yest kb called him and the latest was suspected german measles. gosh! quite sad la.

anyway. i cant believe shawn called yx! shawn, wat did u do? be it a reminder or wat, still.. u shouldn't hv asked him to call me. it doesn't make sense at all. *sadz* actuali now we oso hv nutin to tok abt. the calls are like for formality sake! pointless rite? wat hv seniors done? came and created a big mess in my life. oh well, i guess wat's done cannot be undone, so i shall juz learn to live with it and accept it. wat can i do oso rite? *sigh*

but.. i do miz him. miz those times of fun & laughter. now.. silence reigns.

mOrning! week juz ended, and it ended with a twist. yest we were given "full" dae off, onli had mass dance in sch. sherlyn came over my place aft tt and she played the comp while i baked my brOWnies. *yumz* haha. jiemin and panda came too. i did sth so hoRRibLe! i sabo-ed jm! sent cheng xun her blog address. gosh.. cant believe i did tt. -jm, im sorry.-

oh well, played pool aft tt, lost to panda 5-3. damn..
finally, it was time for the j2 farewell bbq-cum-get to together. unfortunately onli shenzhi & shaun turned up, 2 captains representing all i guess. haiz.. however most of the j1s turned up and tt is a gd sign. we'll go a long way manx.
anyway, they announced the exco. i'm vice-captain! (is tt sth to be very proud of?) *disappointed* still, i'll assist mingyi(capt) well. she's my gd fren after all. the exco: khoon wee(capt) jonathan(v-capt) winghang!(secretary) nicholas(treasurer)

at abt 11pm, panda, panghao & ri-liang came over for an overnight mahJoNg session! i won $6.70 haha little but won the most. shiok! they had tung-i noodles for supper and panda had 2 packets! great appetite rite? anyway we played till 6am tis morning with breaks and eveything in between. slept till 10+ then all left. im not tt sleepy though i slept onli 4 hours. surprising huh? went w/o sleep before so not too bad.

so tts how my week ended. cool huh. hopefully urs was better.
arghh! later hafta attend ColleGe day. waste time in LT. sianz. the thought of it sux! nvm. i shall look on the brite side. hehe.

yoz! im juz testing la... haha